The other side of the Mirror
by lil' white Raven
Summary: Fai hates mirrors; they always reflect back at him what he hates most. What will he do when the mirror looks back at him and talks? Set in Infinity-arc. Has hints of Fai/Ashura Fai/Saku and Fai/Kuro. Fai-centric. Angsty. Remember: You have been warned.


**The Other side of a Mirror.**

_**Author's note: Yay! Yet another Fai-centred fic. Actually 99.99% of all the storyline of this fic belongs to my wonderful friend **__**apple psyche**__**, who gave me this plot and insisted I write with as she is not overly familiar with TRC, yet knew that this story **_**belonged**_**with Fai.  
So any of you who decide this story is good and worthy of review, should pay a visit to her page and send her a long and very thankful message.  
Please note however that because I'm doing the writing, it is in my writing style and that most of the long, angsty (and most likely boring) bits are 100% my creation, and should not be blamed on her. Thank you, and please, try not to get too depressed.**_

Summary:_ Whenever Fai looks into a mirror he always sees something he'd rather forget. What will he do when it begins to talk back? Set during the Infinity-arc. Warning: Dark, depressing and full of Fai angst. Not for the faint of heart.  
_Disclaimer: I don't own Tsubasa. If I did, Fai would be happier, Sakura would have fluffy white wings and Syaoran would actually kiss Sakura already.

Fai closed his eyes as clean hot water poured down onto him from the showerhead above.

Of all the things they had encountered since they had landed in the world of Infinity, showers were the ONLY things Fai truly enjoyed.  
Few of the other worlds they had been to, had understood the meaning of the word 'bath' and the last world-

Fai shook his head. No. He wasn't going to think about it. He'd been having enough depressing thoughts as it was, without them enclosing on his precious cleaning time. He tried to turn his mind onto more pleasant things.

Why did he like taking showers? Because under that wave of water he could forget for those short moments what he was and the sins he had committed. That for a short fraction of time he was someone else, and that all the evil things he had done were washed off him like the dirt, blood and grime he had managed to be covered in by the end of the day.

_**So that he wouldn't have to remember Fai.**_

Absently he wondered if Sakura ever felt like this.  
Of all the dimension-hopping travellers, Sakura was definitely the one Fai felt the most close to.

Both had lost someone they had loved more than anything (permanently or not so permanently; it didn't matter).  
Both felt as if that person's disappearance was entirely their fault.  
And what both wished for, more than anything, was to get take that precious person back.

Fai frowned slightly as the water finally began to grow cold. Sighing, he turned the shower off, and reached for a towel.

After sufficiently drying himself enough, he stepped out of the shower-cube and began to dry his hair.

Of all the things Fai had ever wished for, few were more important to him or as unlikely to be granted; as his wish for that girl to be happy.  
Sakura's quest to be reunited with her Syaoran was doomed from the outset. While no one knew that fact more than Fai himself; he still couldn't help but long for her success and do everything in his power to help her.

Finally having towelled his hair into its usual blond mess, he grabbed his clothes, threw his towel to the side and looked up into the bathroom's mirror.

**Eyes blue as crystal looked back at him unblinkingly. Thick, blond hair was just beginning to reach the tips of those pale, thin milky-white shoulders. The figure in the mirror was beautiful, like a leafless tree, moon glowing overhead, in the depth of winter.  
A beautiful sight, yet somehow sinister and eerie. **

Fai flinched as he glanced into his own reflection. The one thing that never changed, no matter the world, was his reflection.

Sure; outwardly his appearance changed all the time and no matter what he wore he always managed to look stunning. And yet...

The face that always looked back at him made him feel nothing but guilt. Long elegant eyelashes and soft, delicately curved lips that to others made the man look beautiful and frail like a expensive china doll, to him looked fake and made him feel sicked by everything they implied to others.  
Deep ocean-blue eyes which seemed to entrance and bewitch others with their inner-beauty, to him, were hollow of any innocence and simply reminded him of the web of lies, stories and sins he had committed to protect himself from the truth. To hide from the vile sickening creature he had become.

**That he was a traitor.**

The knowledge that all the things that made the people around him like him the way they did; did not belong to him but instead to **him**.

Slowly he reached a hand out towards the sweet plastic smile on the mirror and flinched at the sudden cold that froze his fingertips.

He looked into the mirror and sighed internally, his breath showing up as cold water vapour on the glass.  
_Would Fai have looked like this? Or would he have instead smiled with real joy on his face, ready to fight and protect what he loved with everything he had._

Somehow he knew it was the later. Still smiling, he ran his hand along the mirror's surface, voice breaking slightly as he whispered to it slowly.

"Why did it come to this Fai? Why did I survive with everything the way it is?"

Fai paused and smiled at his own foolishness. What was he expecting? An answer? Maybe he was insane just like that big brute of a ninja was always claiming he was. He turned as his began putting his clothes on. He was a fool.

Which is why as he began to walk away, he almost jumped ten feet when a small, disturbingly familiar voice from behind answered his question.

"You survived because you wanted to."

_**Ahhhh. Finally done. 'Stretches arms in relief'  
So, did any of you wonderful readers like the fic so far?  
This fic is to be a three-shot fic, so it'll be the next chapter that'll have all the 'mystery' factor. **_

_**Sorry about the all angst. I'm not really used to writing this kind of thing.**_

_**Anyway, while this is the my first time writing something so angsty, I do have a few other fanfics waiting to be read, so please: Read and Review.**_

_**Thank You! ^///^ I love all those who review! (Wow. I'm a real player, huh?)**_


End file.
